anchorrestaurantsupply.com - This shidduch/dating service for Orthodox singles uses a anchorrestaurantsupply.com - A directory of dating spots, recommended by site users, in the U.S., Canada, and Israel. . Cedars-Sinai (Los Angeles) - Discover 40 hidden attractions, cool sights, and unusual things to do in Pasadena, Top Discussions in the US: West Travel Forum Los Angeles, California.
Rachel Schwartzberg Illustrations: Yosef Itzkowitz. Yosef Itzkowitz is an artist, author and poet. His published work can be found on Amazon, under the name Yosef Paper. He is currently studying illustration at the School of Visual Arts in New York City and can be reached at yosefitzkowitz gmail. To Molly Abikzer, meeting her husband Joey was truly bashert. Molly is Ashkenazi; Joey is Sephardic. Three years ago, she was living in St.
Louis and he was in Los Angeles. Though Molly and Joey are Orthodox and in their thirties, they had not even one mutual Facebook friend. This despite the fact that Molly has 2, Facebook friends! Not surprisingly, technology has affected how people meet and date—and the frum world is not immune to this drastic shift. Love at First Swipe? JSwipe is one of several online platforms Orthodox Jewish singles use to meet. The mobile app, created in , pushes one suggestion at a time to members—profiles are usually heavy on photos—and they can swipe right if they are interested, or left to pass.
Even Abikzer admits her success with JSwipe may be somewhat of an anomaly. Created in , it was one of the first dating sites for the Orthodox community.
Members create a profile and browse others within selected criteria. They can decide who to contact, and if or when to take the conversation from online to an in-person date. Sarah is a nurse in her thirties who lives in a small Midwestern city. Sarah appreciates the autonomy offered by JWed. The app guides users through an extensive sign-up process, including a series of multiple-choice questions about themselves.
Though artificial intelligence in shidduchim is new, society as a whole has gotten used to online dating. In fact, in Psychology Today estimated that by , 70 percent of people will have met their significant other online.
Opting for Tradition Of course, online dating has not penetrated the entire Orthodox world. Shaya Ostrov, a therapist based in Far Rockaway, New York, notes that in general, the Chareidi sectors prefer a more traditional approach to dating. In her late thirties, she refuses to use online dating sites. Overall, though, he views using algorithm-based technology to find dates as positive. For example, David is divorced and lives in an out-of-town community, sharing custody of his son.
It is not an option for him to relocate to New York—widely recognized as the epicenter of frum dating—in the hope of meeting someone. Ahuva agrees. Sobolofsky notes that dating sites have actually been a major asset in organizing in-person events for singles, which adds an additional opportunity for people to meet and network.
All profiles on JWed must be approved by the site before they are posted. Sobolofsky, who asserts that checking references has changed drastically in an age of social media.
Jonathan, a thirty-two-year-old attorney in New York City, confirms that everyone checks out potential dates on social media, which he feels can be helpful in determining if a potential shidduch is suitable or not. Back then, 5 percent of Americans used at least one social media platform. By , that number had grown to 69 percent of the public, or as high as 86 percent in certain demographics.
As a full-time shadchan for Connections, the shidduch division of Gateways, Fayge Rudman works with singles over age twenty-five from across the spectrum of Orthodoxy. She sees a clear connection between the rise of social media and the growing challenges in dating for frum people.
They get the gorgeous headshot provided by the prospective date, but then they look on Facebook and see real-life pictures. Social media gives an ersatz experience that something is happening. She tries to network for her thirty-three-year-old son and compares it to when her other children got married several years ago. People get hurt and disappointed and feel left out. A relationship is a two-person experience, when they share their lives and express vulnerability in a safe way.
None of this can exist on social media. Many point to the good that has come out of these social platforms. Lots of ideas [for shidduchim] come up that way. Many programs aimed at singles frequently use social media to reach people.
Additionally, individuals and organizations use social media to create vibrant online communities that may serve as both valuable support and networking opportunities, particularly for those who share certain circumstances, such as divorced singles.
The Texting Tangle Online messaging is a staple of dating sites, but ironically, this type of communication may complicate relationships as much as it facilitates them. Ostrov believes that texting is destructive to relationships. You can only create problems. You think you can use texting to cut to the chase.
But the hole gets deeper. Rudman from Connections notes that for dating couples, texting between dates can be a real problem.
Sobolofsky has noticed that in-person conversations are more awkward for some people as they become more comfortable interacting online. Sobolofsky believes the new possibilities offered by technology lead to many positive results.
We check in several times during the day, and we Facetime to say good-night. We have been talking on the phone and texting for several weeks. This article was featured in Jewish Action Summer
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Solve problems in an escape room. However, placing someone in a high-pressure situation and forcing them to problem solve can also do the trick. Over the past few years, several escape room companies have surfaced in Los Angeles.
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